How To Make An Absent Spouse An Ally, Not An Obstacle
ByHere is an interesting question from YB-A.
I have not (managed to) find a solution for a very prevalent situation: qualifying couples.
How could the Natural Selling approach be applied to conversations with potential partners, where involving the spouse is inevitable?
Talking with someone who has an interest in changing their present circumstances and has a partner without that person being present, can be quite common.
This is why one of the many reasons the Natural Selling Approach of taking the time to talk more about the reasons why your potential partner wants to REALLY change, pays off. And this is where Natural Selling again differs from all other training where the objective is to get the person to and through the system as quickly as possible.
Slow down, take your time and get to the deeper issues of why they want what they want. This is where the magic happens… in the moment, for both of you and later for their partner when they talk with them.
Why? Because when your potential partner talks with their partner, the subject is not going to be just about money or freedom or any of those left brained logical things that generally have little meaning, or emotion behind them. It’s going to be more about what your potential business partner or customer is going to get out of it at a much deeper personal level.
The conversation is going to be something like this…
You know honey how I’ve been saying I’ve been feeling really depressed and frustrated about being stuck at home and not being able to make any money except for that boring part time job I’ve got? Well, I was talking with this amazingly helpful person today who has offered to help me get back on my feet and I’m very interested in doing it…
And if their partner is in any way caring they will listen. If they are not caring then it’s probably time to do something anyway!
Ask And Then – Ask Some More!
Unless the issue of a partner being involved has already been brought up by your potential partner… ASK! This is REALLY important. It must be on your list of Qualifying Questions, unless it is already clear that this is going to be an independent decision.
Then follow up with questions like these;
- Is your partner aware of your desire?
- Is he/she supportive of the idea?
- Have you spoken about doing something about it?
- What did you talk about?
- What did you decide?
- How will you tell him/her about this?
If you sense the partner might be resistant, ask;
What will you do if they aren’t supportive of doing this?
This will give the both of you an indication of their resolve to change or adjust their present situation. It might even strengthen their resolve as they realize that it’s their life and they need to be responsible for it.
Qualifying Questions like this are an integral part of the Natural Selling “Discovering Stage”. I talk about them and explain how best to use them in Chapter 12 of my book “How To Sell Network Marketing Without Fear, Anxiety Or Losing Your Friends!“
So, there’s no need to view absent spouses as an obstacle. Follow my simple suggestions and more often than not you’ll find they become an ally.
About the Author
Michael Oliver is an internationally recognized trainer, speaker and author and the founder of Natural Selling, the only sales training program designed to really eliminate rejection and objections. Visit his blog and signup free to get blog updates by email, along with the latest news, free advice, additional resources, and a lot more! Go now to http://naturalsellingblog.com. While you're at it, check out http://www.naturalselling.com.Subscribe by email and get blog updates, news, and more!
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Great sharing Oliver…
Great tip Michael, it makes it a lot easier when you have both spouses on the same page as far as what they want out of life!
My husband has never had any interest to be an active part of my business but has always been supportive in not sharing any negative thoughts/feelings he may have – sometimes that’s the best you can ask for I suppose.
Yes that can be true Ronald and also read Ann Zuerner’s comment. Different strokes for different folks!
Your husband seems to be a wise man!
When I came into MLM that was a question that was asked of me. My response was that my wife and I would pray about it and the decision would be based on whether we both agreed to go with it. My sponsor said that was a great idea and I should leave it in God’s hand that way. Well, we did agree that I should pursue this and now I have some support. Without your spouse on board it won’t work anyhow. So don’t be afraid of getting both of them to look at your opportunity. You may want to talk to the spouse as well before they make the decision.
When I came into MLM that was a question that was asked of me. My response was that my wife and I would pray about it and the decision would be based on whether we both agreed to go with it. My sponsor said that was a great idea and I should leave it in God\’s hand that way. Well, we did agree that I should pursue this and now I have some support. Without your spouse on board it won\’t work anyhow. So don\’t be afraid of getting both of them to look at your opportunity. You may want to talk to the spouse as well before they make the decision.
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